November 2010
1 post
1ryj9 09ys
http://mcsilverfactory.net//images/z61.html o3jej epllv6 0t6rtec1e 89p Posted via email from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
January 2010
8 posts
You Have a Penis, & That's Totally OK!
God’s balls, Batman, what happened?! Yes, this is going to be one of THOSE blog posts, where I swear a lot. Like the good old days! Because someone intelligent reassured me that Jesus actually doesn’t care about my liberal use of perfectly good Anglo-Saxon words (it’s the French that made them dirty in the first place. What don’t the French ruin? Ok, souffles. And my...
Chuckfest 2010: When I Was Just A Little Girl
My intention was to sit here & write out my Chuckfest 2010 report. And by the power of Greyskull, I will. Must…resist…responding to…smarmy, snippy…judgmental, mean spirited…Twitter leftists… *imagine now the pained expression of someone desperately trying not to throw up on her prom date’s shoes…now imagine someone breathing through the rage,...
An Open Letter To Teh Mens
It’s not you; it’s me. I apologize in advance for my abject fear. While your kind attention does not go unappreciated by me, it is also admittedly met with trepidation & a measure of suspicion. This is not your fault. Previous representatives of your gender were either ill prepared to deal with this model or grew tired if it’s many bugs. Rather than be returned, this model...
An Open Letter To Teh Mens
It’s not you; it’s me. I apologize in advance for my abject fear. While your kind attention does not go unappreciated by me, it is also admittedly met with trepidation & a measure of suspicion. This is not your fault. Previous representatives of your gender were either ill prepared to deal with this model or grew tired if it’s many bugs. Rather than be returned, this model...
Non-Bacon Bits of My Sexy Vampire Novel
I am trying to force myself to work on my novel rather than, y’know, wax verbose about Jesus & healthcare & what not. Instead, I started reading my novel & found a part that’s not too spoilery & also miraculously not bacon-related. Since some of you have been pestering me for more bits, I felt it wouldn’t do too much harm to post it. This is most of chapter four....
I Once Was (a) Lost (Stupid Cat), But Now Am Found
Things all happen at once, for a reason, and I have no control over them, the bastards. The more I try to not talk about my more recent religious experiences, the more they keep popping up like so much cat hair on black trousers. I need to let the cat thing go, but I can’t. Jesus is now irretrievably linked in my mind with crazy cat ladies. Yes, this is another Jesus post. A very sweet,...
Babbling Toward Happiness: An Audio Blog
Download now or listen on posterous Memo.m4a (2709 KB) Sent from my iPhone Posted via email from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
Who Are You Freaking People And What Do You Want...
Hi, preciousfaces. I love you. Also, I have had a little gin. And cider. And now wine. But my love is genuine, silky, real, & slightly blurry, We are in a new year. This year, for those who can’t count, don’t leave their solitary confinement, or are dyslexic is 2010, not 1020. That year actually kind of blew, historically. But 2010 is going to rock nards. Do you know why? ...
December 2009
7 posts
The VonCrap Family Singers, or Christmas Highlight...
This was the best effin’ Christmas ever, people, hands down. This is even better than the time I got the bike that I did not for one second belonged to me. My Mum loves to tell that story. I apparently walked into my parents’ bedroom (as it did not fit under the tree) and remarked, “There’s a bike in here.” It had a big red bow, & my mother said it came from...
If I Am In Jail By The End Of Today...
…it will be deemed justifiable homicide. It will, I promise you. Let me explain, your honour. So the Twitterverse knows that a little while ago I had to complete a 120+ page project in a week. Additionally I kept getting emails & phone calls via the underwriter for weeks after, all of them stupid questions a brain dead squashed monkey would be ashamed to ask. This thing has set me...
Superfreak
I am, without intent or desire, kinda weird.I know this; you know this. It’s not news, or a secret, or even probably of remote interest to most folks. The problem is, the more normal I try to get, the weirder people seem to think I am. This brings me to the subject at hand: deviancy. Inspired by today’s compelled readings (ok so fine, my arm remains untwisted), eager to shoot back at...
Blue Blouse
Here’s *a* photo. There could be more, but it was all a blur. It was kinda badda boom badda bing this year. And by “it” I mean the office Christmas party. And nobody did the worm or pole danced, so I am sad. Also I am still at work; everyone else is gone. Murderus rage welling up as I type. Yup. Posted via email from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
Boomerang Toomerang Soomerang
I am currently chuckling to myself. I am happy. I am happier than I have been in years, and I am even happier to tell you all why. It’s not going to be overly easy to explain. Some of you in fact are going to be downright dismayed by the whole thing. Actually, judging from some of your recent blog entries & exasperated tweets, you are already dismayed. This is understandable, as...
Life In The So Called Space Age
Lots of you don’t “get” Twitter, & that’s fine, but this is what Twitter is supposed to be used for…ok, maybe not. But this is the best use I’ve gotten out of it since the “fake Chuck spoilers” night of hilarity: Me: @adamsbaldwin *tap tap* http://bit.ly/54MUea You’ve helped me lose 2 followers today. ROCK! Now I feel like I’m saying...
You Want To Believe
If you’re not an X-Files fan…wtf are you reading my blog for? Get lost, you fricken’ heathen! Er…wait, no, I promised I was going to stop starting my posts by alienating 90% of my readers. So…yah. Eh hem. I shall start over. If you’re not an X-Files fan, you don’t “get” the title, so I shall explain. Mulder, the FBI agent played by David...
November 2009
26 posts
The Most Important Inanimate Object In The World
This is Teddy. He looks bloody good for his age, 33, which in teddy bear years is something like Yoda. This bear has been in 3 continents, lost in at least 2 MotherCares, driven across an entire nation to be retrieved, and received more surgery than Joan Rivers. That’s why his arms are all apostrophied.If you’re on Facebook or remember from when I was Fan of the Month on...
Thanksgiving Noms!
Look at this darling table! Didn’t my Mum do great? I made the sweet potatoes & my sister did the veggies. My brother joined us briefly, shoveled, then retired to his Man Cave (like they do). This was the best Thanksgiving EVER. Really. Will say more about that after the coma. Posted via email from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
Wicked. Unadulterated. SQUEEE!!!!
Chuck Season THREE, bitches! Chuck talk Thai! Posted via web from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
Can You Feel The Love?
Several of you have not quite understood what I mean when I say that the current health care bill up for debate before the Senate is not the change in which you want to believe. The reason for this is because you haven’t read it, & in fact have not even skimmed any summaries of it. Many of you have heard the words “health care reform” & assumed it was all faeries,...
Where I Assume The Role of a Non-Intimidating...
Tomorrow I am going to buy things, doing my part to stimulate the economy. As the things I will buy are intended to help me stay sexiful and, in fact, improve upon it, I’ll be stimulating all parts, after a fashion. Here is one thing I intend to buy, as Ulta is having a sale: ...
Teh Internets Made Baby Neil Cry
Neil, a petite emotionally disturbed tuxedo cat, just spent 15 minutes ramming his face into my lap top over & over again. “Aww, he’s just marking it as his,” you say naively, because you don’t understand that I’ve stopped existing anywhere outside of Teh Internets. Baby Neil is trying to break me OUT of the computer. I’ve become, kinda, Skynet. *just...
Hoth Is For Pussies!
Currently making me cry, in a way that is followed by squealing laughter: JESUS I wish Yoda had at least ONCE said “Sunday Sunday Sunday!” Posted via web from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
Please Understand
Here is another clever article about why private, individual health care is a more palatable answer than the alternative. It rants less than me, isn’t funny, & has no swearing. So, if you’re into that, I’m sorry. If you just want a concise additional explanation of how government has already screwed up health care spending & costs in America, check this out: ...
Chuck for the MotherChuckin' WIN!!!!!!
Check out this website I found at chuckmeout.com EPIC EFFING AWESOMENESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CHUCK IS BACK! SEASON 3 PREMIERE SUNDAY, JAN 10th, 9/8c Squee squee squee squee squee squee oh and also LOL LIKE A PSYCHOTIC WOMBAT MONSTER. Assassin! Posted via web from Did I Fall Asleep? | Comment »
In The Dressing Room
Get yer head out. This is after I got my clean bill of health, apres mammogram & ultrasound. I am wearing my new peacoat! This is the best light I could find and YES, Morgan, I had to hold the phone up high so you can see some of the coat.Old Navy, $62. Awesome Actually warm, satin lined, dry clean only. Yes, that is the final hair colour. It’s way in your face with bright reditude....
Yes! THIS!!!
Ok, so you know how I’ve been posting bits & bobs here, there, & everywhere about health care & why the current plan up before the Senate is not an option? I mean, aside from the fact that it requires us to buy insurance, but apparently has a loophole so insurers don’t have to insure us…HUH? WHAT? Yeah, my law people (ok, person) is working that one out as I swear...
Hair At Work
Here is the new hair after another wash & in flourescent light. I am acneriffic. Considering the amount of pink in the tub this morning, I am pretty sure this is NOT the final result.Meaningful content? Um… Research before ridicule. Can we be blamed for the security of ignorance? Er, the last one is Alan Wilder. The former is me. Thinkies not coming fast today. Posted via email ...
Raspberry Head
Stephanie at work described this colour, Ion’s Demi-Permanent Light Burgundy Blonde, as “raspberry”. After taking several photos of it, I have to agree. This is obviously going to mellow after another couple of washes, but right now it’s pink, purple & red depending on where I am in relation to light. I posted 3 photos so you could see.The amazing thing is that I had...
40 lbs and counting!
This was taken Nov. 4, 2009. I have lost 40 lbs in this photo. Clearly I have further to go, but this is a vast improvement on 40 lbs before that! So I figure it’s a booyah moment, yo. Posted via email from Stupid, Stupid Girl | Comment »
Fluffers Couch Wubz
This is the sweet dainty adorableness of my sofa. Neil was apparently distracted by the demon soul in the wall again, seeing as how just prior to this, he was cuddling the bear. Posted via email from Stupid, Stupid Girl | Comment »
Cutest. Neil. EVAR!
Dude, seriously. How ridiculous is this glamourous cuteness? Posted via email from Stupid, Stupid Girl | Comment »
Politically Verklempt
Adam Baldwin’s Big Hollywood posts make yall so insane with rage, I know rub my little hands together in anticipation of a new one. I’m kind of hoping he goes after the Care Bears next. “Prepare to stare? Where are those little bastards’ manners? Their mothers are obviously leftists who never taught them any.” That would make me giddy. But instead, he posted this:...
Hey Yous, I Don't Sound English, Yo
Download now or listen on posterous SBEvsSAE.wav (191 KB) Here is a recording of my voice for those of you who wish I sounded English. I don’t. I’m sorry. Unless you are from Japan or Thailand, then apparently you hear it anyway. Mazeltov! Posted via email from Stupid, Stupid Girl | Comment »
The Easy Feel Good Nothingness
I demand you read this: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704795604574519671055918380.html I’ll wait. It’s much shorter than 1,900 pages. Done? Ok. I’m going to ignore your multicultural tizzy, as you are entitled to your opinion. That’s a feelings issue, & I can’t argue with feelings. However, I am going to give you some facts based on my experience...
When Do We Want It? NOW! Unread! Not Understood!...
Many of you whom, you must admit, do not work in the patient care industry have been plying me with “it’s not fair” questions lately regarding pre-existing conditions. “But the Pelosi Plan is sound, as it forces insurers to cover pre-existing conditions! Therefore, it’s good! Good, good, good! And you’re a big meanie for not trusting it immediately even though...
Twitter Has Destroyed My Sexy Vampire Novel
What was originally a taut procedural thriller involving creatures of the night, enough sexual tension to hold up a suspension bridge, and loads of intriguing genetic science has now become, for all intents and purposes, a loving tribute to bacon. BACON. I blame you people. Oh, you know who you are, tweeps. You and your geekly pursuit of all things bacon flavoured, bacon oriented, bacon...
Not My Good Side
They say everyone has a good side & a bad side. I never take photos from this side, & some of you snippier types love pointing that out. Well, jerks, here’s my lumpy quasimodo side as of today. Enjoy finding me less attractive; I hope this allows you lead a fuller, richer life somehow.*refusing to put a winky face* Posted via email from Stupid, Stupid Girl | Comment » ...
"Diet" Mac & Cheese
Why is THIS diet food? It’s so rich & filling, you won’t be able to have but a tiny portion. It looks pink because of my red curtains.In the mac & cheese: A packet of brown rice elbow macaroni A handful & a half of grilled chicken About 3 egg whitesA handful of sharp cheddar A handful of mozzarellaA heaping tablespoon of mascarpone Several sundried tomatoes, juliennedSalt...
The Winky-faceification of Social Networking
So here’s something I haven’t understood since 1994. My mum has accused our society of getting more & more sarcastic since I can remember, and apparently I am mostly responsible for what she considers the inevitable snarky downfall of society. However, the second we all started using teh Interwebs, we totally forgot about the snarkification of the world & decided to take...
Common Sense Ain't
What do 19 year olds, little teapots, & doctors have in common? The ability to make me go *headdesk* ALL DAY. Sorry, that was redundant. Many 19 year olds and doctors ARE little teapots. “When I get all steamed up, hear me shout!” New Rule: You don’t get to argue with me about ANYthing unless you know A. think and B. know what the fuck you’re talking about. Also, if...
Girl Casey!
Here’s my Halloween “costume”. It’s my basic vampy weekend look, but then I realized I was dressed like Casey during his non-Buy More hours. Add a gun, open the door with it, scare kids. Costume!Yes, I realize this will fan the Caseyjane flames, which is fine & encouraged. Chuck & Sarah can’t hog all the shipper fun. Turn your murderous rage somewhere that...
Girl Casey!
Here’s my Halloween “costume”. It’s my basic vampy weekend look, but then I realized I was dressed like Casey during his non-Buy More hours. Add a gun, open the door with it, scare kids. Costume!Yes, I realize this will fan the Caseyjane flames, which is fine & encouraged. Chuck & Sarah can’t hog all the shipper fun. Turn your murderous rage somewhere that...
October 2009
32 posts
OMG SUPER MEGA KAWAII!!!!!
Ok so Persephone & Neil traditionally HATE each other, but see! See! Snuggles! OMG precious! Yes, I AM trying not to squeal so they won’t run away. And of course they chose the most elegant surface they could find in the house, because they are luxurious beasts. Awww. Mommy is so happy.This peace of course will not last. Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent...
OMG SUPER MEGA KAWAII!!!!!
Ok so Persephone & Neil traditionally HATE each other, but see! See! Snuggles! OMG precious! Yes, I AM trying not to squeal so they won’t run away. And of course they chose the most elegant surface they could find in the house, because they are luxurious beasts. Awww. Mommy is so happy.This peace of course will not last. Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent...
Kawaii!!!!
Persephone & Neil snugglesome friendsome friends! Awwww! Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent Girl | Comment »
Kawaii!!!!
Persephone & Neil snugglesome friendsome friends! Awwww! Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent Girl | Comment »
Rabbit Food Fod Rabbit Gods
Herb & field green salad w/ sugar snap peas. Trader Joe’s Pear, Champagne & Gorgonzola vinaigrette. Blueberry pommegranite tea w/ a splash of lime mineral water. Goddamn, this is good. Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent Girl | Comment »
I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watchin' Meeee!
Look at this little love bucket! Baby Neil Cat is sitting right next to my head, staring at me, sucking on his tail & purring. He’s wearing his Raiders colours but he’s not overly depressed; Mommy got bored & isn’t yelling at the TV any more. He smells like soft powder. Posted via email from Stupid Omnipotent Girl | Comment »